Love in Business - It’s Not That Kind of Love

Love in Business - It’s Not That Kind of Love
By John Aberle

I’ve had a dream of speaking about love in sales for a couple of years now, but frankly the topic scares me a little. I mean we’ve seen Presidents of the United States and U.S. Congressmen brought to task for love in the workplace. Recently golf icon Tiger Woods felt compelled to apologize for love outside his home. So while I wholeheartedly believe in the importance of love in sales, it’s not that kind of love.

The problem with English is that many words like love have radically different meanings. Latin had many words for love, but two relevant here:

  • Amor for love, passion, fondness, desire or an object of love, darling - from the University of Notre Dame’s translation site.
  • Caritas for dearness, high price, affection, love, and esteem from the same

The point is that amor relates to a more physical or sexual love while caritas is the root for our English word charity and so ties in to spiritual love or an unselfish love for others.

Love in sales means caring for their concerns first. So when I talk about love in sales, I mean that heart-centered, soft sell sales and marketing requires a base of caring for others enough to put their interests ahead of your personal gain long enough to find out what they need and want, what their problems and desires are, what they expect the outcome to be. Provided you can help them, then you do so. This kind of love is related to the expression often associated with the Hippocratic Oath, “First, do no harm.”

Making a connection in sales or in marketing is a spiritual service because from this viewpoint sales and marketing are all about love and the understanding that all life is interrelated. This is the love that makes connections. This is the love that produces a sense of fulfillment through sales.

What we do to someone else will ultimately come back to us. So when you are working with prospects, once you are sure they agree that you understand what their concerns are, you can recommend a solution. Ideally, you will have the product or service they need. If not, from the viewpoint of “do no harm,” tell them where to go if you know or be honest that what you have doesn’t fit their situation this time.

Becoming a trusted adviser benefits you The main benefit to you to forgo your immediate interests long enough to care first about your prospects, customers and clients is that you can earn the role of trusted adviser. This position leads to long term relationships that tend to be more profitable because of the added value your trusted advice provides.

So the good news is that love in sales, done right, is not that kind of love that will get you notoriety and media attention for your transgressions. On the other hand, it is that kind of love that makes connections with customers and gains you the trust allowing you to help customers buy. And, it is the kind of love that makes selling fun, fulfilling, and mutually rewarding.

My friends Judith & Jim wrote a book going into more detail about selling as a service so if you want to understand more about this approach, check out their book “The Heart of Marketing: Love Your Customers and They Will Love You Back”.

Would you like to reprint this article? You may as long as you include this blurb in its entirety: To continue learning about heart-centered, soft sell sales and marketing, I invite you to opt-in to my community. In return, I will send you my current free bonus as well as my periodic ezine, “Selling for Fun, Fulfillment and Mutual Rewards.” Look for my opt-in on the right hand column of my latest blog post at HelpCustomersBuy.com. I bring almost 30 years experience in successful sales and marketing to my present role as a consultant, coach, and speaker. I share ways that selling can be fun, fulfilling and mutually rewarding - for the customer as well as the salesperson.
(c) 2010, John R. Aberle

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